What not to say to bisexual people: 4 sentences you'd better swallow

Bisexual people, i.e. people who are sexually attracted to people of at least two genders or sexes, are not as "media-savvy" as gays and lesbians, but perhaps that is why they encounter several prejudices. What are they and why should we avoid them?

1. "It's just a phase."

From some people's perspective, it's as clear as day: For example, if you date a man first and then a woman, it means you're no longer romantically attracted to men. But it's like thinking that if I first date someone who's 6 feet tall and then someone who's 1 foot shorter, I'm no longer attracted to tall people.

Of course, this doesn't mean that bisexuals' preferences can't change throughout their lives - but they do change for others too: In our twenties, we may be attracted to people who look and behave differently than we do in our forties.

2. "So you like threesomes?"

Some people think that being attracted to people of more than one gender or sex means that they need to have sexual relationships with all of them at once... and ideally, have sex with them all at once.

And while there are people with a bisexual orientation who do indeed seek out sex with three, four, or more people, that's no different from non-bisexual people who also enjoy this kind of sex. Even people who are attracted to people of only one sex or gender.

3. "Don't you miss men/women/non-binary people?"

Similar question to the previous one: When someone is attracted to people of more than one gender or sex, does that mean they have to be in a relationship with all of them at once?

But as we explained in the first questions, just because we are in a relationship with someone who has a certain identity does not mean that we cannot be attracted to someone else. However, this does not mean that we have to be in a sexual or romantic relationship with several different people. Conversely: People with a heterosexual or homosexual orientation can also enter into non-monogamous relationships, although according to some research they enter into such relationships less often .

4. "It's great when you have more people to choose from."

Yes, it would be nice, but... Just because someone is bisexual doesn't mean everyone will want to date them. Biphobia, or prejudice and discrimination against bisexual people, unfortunately exists and not everyone is willing to have romantic or sexual relationships with them, partly because of the prejudices we discussed above.